It started back when I got married & decided to settle down. This ever growing stagnation of my faith, that was compounded year after year as the endless responsibilities of life piled on my task lists. With each child, that list grew and began shifting my attention from the radical relationship I had with God my Father to my ever present list of duties. At first, the blame seems to lie with marriage, parenthood and my career path but this is far from the truth. Cast that thought out as a boomerang, only to watch it return asking for a better definition of what really happened with your faith.
The truth is: I’m lazy when it comes to my faith. When my responsibilities grew, then my faith should have as well, making it a higher priority to spend time in the Word, prayer & cultivating my dependency on Christ. But at the end of weary days, I spent my time escaping in books, video games, and household chores. My heart’s desires changed. I was no longer excited about the pilgrimage of my faith and instead began looking for heaven on earth. The end result is a constant stream of stress and guilt, having not lived up to the model I expected to be for my children. Furthermore, my wife suffers from a burnt out husband who is just tired at the end of the day.
Paul captured this same thought process in 1 Corinthians:
Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it.
Don’t stop mid-pilgrimage but continue running long after your legs give way. When you’re out of breath, press on and do not give into the world’s facade of comfort & rest. For that rest is found only in Christ, who is in heaven sitting next to the right hand of the Father. Therefore, heaven will not be found on earth but in him and we must continue pursuit.